Potential

Years ago in Portland I started a preschool co-op with some friends for our 3-year-olds. Why would I send my kids away from me to learn? I had smart, wonderful friends--we could do this! Fast forward a couple of years to Kindergarten. I'm the one who didn't send my 5-year-old away. Society won't dictate to me what I have to do! (Thank you, father, for my rebellious streak)

Jump ahead a year and we were in Provo, buckling down for the hardest 2 years of my life: Stephen's MBA program. Right away I got with a group of amazing women--the MBA Spouses Association at BYU. It is not an organization to trifle with--it is made up of a group of dedicated, hard-working women who make lofty goals and reach them. I noticed what we accomplished and was impressed.

Provo is also when I became absorbed in the education of my children--and myself. 2 years on my own--and feeling so alone--taught me that I do have what it takes to teach my children.

Finally, MBA graduation. We'll be in Minnesota for Stephen's PhD program until 2015. By the time we left Provo I saw myself as a strong, capable woman who can do hard things when the Lord is on my side. I knew that was true--the 2 years of the MBA program proved that to me. I was unafraid and ready to work. No more plush my-husband-comes-home-from-work-at-lunch-so-I-can-go-running (my life in Portland) life. I was prepared and ready.

Life in Minnesota continues to teach me. One time a friend was telling an acquaintance about my kids and said, "They are the smartest kids I know--she homeschools." That really rubbed me wrong--my children aren't any more intelligent than other children--they just have time and freedom to explore and discover what they are passionate about. Every child has the same potential they have.

That got me thinking--if I am so certain that my children have boundless potential, what about me? I, too, am a child of God, and he loves me and I love him. Doesn't he love me as much as he loves my children? Might I also have a reason and purpose for being on the earth at this time?

I have thought about that for the last year and a half, and I have decided that there is a reason I am in this place at this time. There is something that I can do to help build the kingdom of God on the earth. That thought combined with an abundance of faith and lack of fear has great power in my life.

I'm getting ready to hold my 2nd Gifts of the Heart Exchange here in Minnesota. Last year nearly 200 people came and took home much needed--and wanted--items. Clothing, toys, baby gear, household items, bikes...and I got to a part of seeing their happiness. I am on a Board of Directors that put on a production of "The Nutcracker" a few weeks ago--it was hard work, but very rewarding to see the dancing and hear comments from the audience. I teach my 5 kids at home and spoke at a homeschooling conference last year--I love encouraging new homeschooling families as they learn a different way of life. My kids and I visit a local nursing home several times a month and sing the old songs to the residents. My life is full of meaning and purpose.

I don't say any of this to say "Look at me! Look at the great things I am doing!" My contribution is a widow's mite, so to speak--but the Lord was grateful for that widow's mite. I'm merely a pencil in the hand of God. Where I am in my personal development now is light years away from where I was when I whined when Stephen worked more than 40 hours a week. Sometimes I look back at my little self and pat that young mom on the head and think how cute and sweet (and naive) I was.

And as I think of my children, I don't think I'm any better or more intelligent or more anything than anyone else. I had a serious growing time--and it wasn't easy--and realized my potential--and that potential is incredible.

What if every woman and man had a glimpse of their potential? What if every woman in the Relief Society believed that what they do makes a difference in this world? What if each of us found some thing to be passionate about--to work and pray for? Can you even imagine what our world would be like? What if the Relief Society wasn't merely a social institution but a catalyst for amazing programs and ideas?

There is power in us--we can't settle for mediocrity when there is greatness wanting to get out!